Thursday, December 3, 2015

Carpi-Milan Preview: Exes and Ohs


It’s true what they say that exes will haunt you. I mean Zaccardo haunted us even before he was an ex. But this particular set of exes will be interesting this time. Both Borriello and Captain Zaccardo are legendary in their own rights, for different reasons, but together, they’re terrifying. Like in the same way a balding, middle-aged man hitting on you when you are in college is terrifying … oh, hopefully that never happened to you, but trust me – it’s terrifying. But enough about my past dating traumas, this game could likely be about our exes and ohs.

Exes and uh-ohs

With Carpi in 19th place in the table, most people look at this match as three guaranteed points. But not only are there 90 minutes, 22 players plus subs, and a ref between us and those points, but Carpi could be tricky. Castori was the manager who led Carpi to their inaugural Serie A promotion last season, then was sacked at the end of September this season, with Carpi taking only two points in six matches during that time. Sannino got five weeks in the hot seat, and despite a win and a draw during that time, he was sacked and Castori came back. But under Castori’s watch, Carpi won both in the league on Sunday and then again in the Coppa Italia on Thursday. So we are definitely catching them as they are finding some kind of form.

They may be tired from playing on Thursday, but they also have home advantage. Well kind of, they play in nearby Modena’s stadium which holds about 21,000 people. We’ll have to see what the fan base is for a 19th place team not playing in their own city. But I think it will be the exes that hurt us. They actually both scored (with Borriello also assisting Zaccardo’s goal) on Sunday vs. Genoa to secure only their second victory of the season. For that match, Castori lined up Belec; Letizia, Captain Zaccardo, Gagliolo, Simone Romagnoli (no relation, but he is a Milan youth product;) Cofie, Pasciuti, Lollo, Martinho; Matos, and Mbakogu. However, Matos is questionable due to fitness and they’ll be missing Benussi, Bianco, Bubnjic, Spolli, and Fedele.

This young striker is hungry to score his first Serie A goal

Meanwhile, Milan’s injury list grew as Antonelli suffered a muscle injury in training yesterday and will miss the trip, along with De Jong, Diego Lopez, Bertolacci, Balotelli, and Menez with their long-term injuries. Mihajlovic also has to deal with the mentality of the squad and the fans, having fielded a 4-4-2 on Sunday with starters to trounce Sampdoria, then fielded a complete bench team with a 4-3-3 and needing extra time and three starters as subs to prevent being knocked out of the Coppa Italia by Crotone on Tuesday. Despite the obvious differences in squads, Milan fans are certainly weary of the lack of consistency, so a even a convincing win vs. Carpi may not win them over this week.

Besides, it is foolish to assume that we will be able to take on the dynamic duo of ex-Milan players and have our hearts live to tell about it. Marco "I score with the ladies” Borriello already has three goals in nine appearances, and Captain Zaccardo, the WORLD CUP WINNER, also has a goal and a killer Twitter account, too. Oh, and don’t forget Kevin Lasagna… have you ever been beaten by lasagna? Let’s hope that truly we don’t ever have to find out what that’s like. On paper, we should win this thing hands down. But as Mihajlovic pointed out this week, games aren’t won on paper, they are won on the pitch. And when you are sharing that pitch with your exes, anything goes. Like exes and ohs.


This post inspired by the music of Elle King


Carpi vs. Milan
Sunday, December 6 • 20:45 CET (2:45pm EST)
This match is being shown LIVE on RAI and BeIN Sports in the U.S.