Anything that is hard in life is worth having. That includes
hardware. As in the Coppa Italia trophy. That also comes with a magic patch that we
could put on those awful new Puma kits to dress them up a bit next season. Plus there’s
bragging rights. Beating the team that is likely to lift a seventh consecutive
Scudetto here in a couple of weeks is worth bragging about. It would also take a
bit of the sting off of a season that didn’t live up to everyone’s dreams. But
it would also mean automatic qualification into the Europa League group stages. And that gives the team the
opportunity to come here to the U.S. to see me… I mean to play in the ICC
tournament and make some serious cash while they frolic under the Southern
California sun... sorry, I was daydreaming. Let’s just say that this match is all
about the hardware.
Juventus are a winning machine. They have done everything
right in recent years, from the top all the way down to their stupid new logo.
No, that was not right at all. It’s not natural. It’s a hideous freak of nature blight
on their storied colors. Granted, they can’t win a Champions League final to
save their lives, but hey, at least being the best of Serie A is better than not winning
anything at all. Which is really what I hope they do in this final… lose. I
feel like our guys deserve to come to Los Angeles and play in the historic Rose
Bowl and maybe see some sights… oops, there I go again… sorry, daydreaming once more.
The real trouble with Juve is that they have Allegri. He
hasn’t managed to run them into the ground like he did at Milan, but he also
struggles with finals. And smiling without creeping everyone out. And also
lineups and squad rotation. But luckily for them, Juve have so many great players, it’s
not like playing Russian roulette every time the lineups are announced. The
players he’s called up for this match are: Buffon, Szczesny, Pinsoglio, De Sciglio, Benatia, Alex Sandro, Barzagli,
Howedes, Rugani, Lichtsteiner, Pjanic, Khedira, Marchisio, Matuidi, Asamoah,
Sturaro, Bentancur, Cuadrado, Higuain, Dybala, Douglas Costa, Mandzukic, and Bernardeschi.
Chiellini is still injured, which sucks for him, but is great for our injury
list. But may help Milan find their way here to California this summer...
 |
| Yes, he is crazy... but the good kind of crazy |
The shocking news
for Milan is that Biglia has been included in the squad. Gattuso said he wasn’t
sure he would play him even still, given that he fractured two vertebrae in his lower back
just two and a half weeks ago. But he said he would get to the Coppa final, and
he will be there. But other than Conti, I believe everyone else is called up. Which is perfect, because we need everyone to earn their trip here to the beautiful beaches of Southern California... wow, I really am distracted. Sorry.
Let’s hope they
play the game not only of this season, but of their lives. Because playing here
in Los Angeles just feels right… I can't even get through one paragraph... sorry. Even Juventus know that we have what it takes to beat them. And that we have their amazing would-have-been captain. Winning this game would mean we would take a trophy from those
awful, entitled fans, too. Plus the magic patch next year. And a trip to Los Angeles. And bragging rights. And a Europa League Group Stage spot. So many things at stake in 90 short minutes. It may not be easy, but I
definitely think we can beat them if every member works together to make it
work. And after all, it’s all about the hardware.
This post
inspired by the music of Survivor’s “The Eye of the Tiger”
The Coppa Italia
Final
Juventus vs. AC Milan
Wednesday, May 9 • 21:00 CEST (12noon EDT)
This match will be shown LIVE on GolTV in
the U.S.