Saturday, December 16, 2023

Milan-Monza Preview: The Imposters

Saturday marked Milan's 124th Birthday, and Cardinale and Furlani's pettiness was on full display in the official social media post. Milan fans did not miss the fact that the man who won five of our seven Champions League trophies and seven of our 19 Scudetti on the pitch, as well as our most recent Scudetto as a director had the smallest picture. (The largest picture was reserved for RedBird's newest employee, Ibrahimović, which is just disgusting, even he does not like such blatant brown nosing. And the absurd hot air balloon should not have even been there, but was as big as Maldini's pic.) After failing to wish Daniel Maldini, a currently owned Milan player, a happy birthday on social media, this was too much even for those who had failed to support Maldini when he was shamelessly sacked by these charlatans. Already this week, we saw the team miss the mark in the Champions League and drop down to the Europa League qualifiers. Clearly, our club is run by imposters.

Revising Milan's history since 2022.

But I digress. Sunday at lunchtime, Milan host the Milan Imposters, Berlusconi's Milan 2.0. (Not to be confused with Cardinale, who irreverently labeled himself Berlusconi 2.0 while Berlusconi's family were still grieving.) After seeing Milan blossom again, Berlusconi missed football enough that he bought nearby Monza, injected cash, and helped them reach Serie A again. 

Now in their second season in the top flight, Raffaele Palladino have the team in tenth place in the league. Their most recent match was a 1-0 win over Gilardino's Genoa last weekend. For that match, Palladino lined up: Di Gregorio; Pereira, D'Ambrosio, Carboni, Kyriakopoulos; Gagliardini, Pessina; Colpani, Carboni, Ciurria; and Milan's own Colombo. Palladino will be missing Pablo Marí and Caprari to injury, and of course, is missing Papu Gomez, who is serving a two year ban for doping after taking his son's cough syrup during his time at Sevilla.

More Milan than Milan's current management.

You may remember that Milan have already played Monza this year, in the Trofeo Silvio Berlusconi back in August. Milan won that match on penalties after a 1-1 draw. This time, however, Milan will be hosting them at San Siro, with the hosts having played their final Champions League match of the year on Wednesday. Knowing Pioli, he will likely rotate his squad for this one. However, it will not be an easy match, and he really should field his best available starting 11.

That starting 11, however, is still impacted by injuries. Still out for this match are Sportiello, Caldara, Pellegrino, Thiaw, and Kalulu to injury. Musah is also out of this one, as he is ill. Calabria is suspended for this one after his red card last week vs. Atalanta. Kjaer returned to full training with the team on Friday, but it is unlikely that he would be available to start in this match. So there will be at least seven players out still for this one.

They could be true Milan players, but they are owned by imposters.

Pioli will have young players like Bartesaghi, Simić, and possibly Alex Jiménez to fill in the gaps in defense. But with how this team have played this season, and their notorious poor form at the lunchtime slot, this one has all of the signs of a birthday hangover match. With the look back at the Club's history after 124 years, this squad is far from Capello's Invincibles side. Between the petty, dysfunctional owner and management, a coach who is in over his head and without support, and a team that was created with algorithms instead of footballing knowledge, this team are more like the Imposters.



This post inspired by the music of Måneskin's "Timezone"


Our next match is 
Serie A Week 16
Milan vs. Monza
Sunday, December 17, 2023 • 12:30 CET (6:30am EST)
In the U.S., you can use a VPN to access a Serie A provider elsewhere
For example, sign up for BeIN Sports in Australia or SuperSport in South Africa,
they both use the World Feed commentary for Serie A, which is fantastic
(*and they also do not sponsor Inter's kits)